The Great driveTRAIN Robbery (at Knott’s, 2002)

February 16, 2018 /   /  Humor Department

The Great driveTrain Robbery

It all began when we asked Fiber Jet’s Tim Figuhr (Roseville, California) to raise his Cobra’s bonnet so we could check out his now-legendary ‘Thunder-Clatter’ engine.

Tim readily agreed, but he insisted upon first employing his trusty California Duster to restore the glisten to his Cobra’s clearcoat (darned near invisible) finish.

Note how well it performed to polish his hood scoop. Tim, um, you’re supposed to remove the protective sleeve.

But all was not going well in Mudv… make that Roseville. You see, sometime during the show a truly tumultuous event occurred with his beloved 427SC Cobra replica. Read on.

Tim raised the bonnet on his ‘menace of the motorways,’ only to discover that someone had pinched his powerplant, inexplicably replacing it with what appeared to be a curiously misshapen variant of a Jerry Can.

‘Not to worry,’ proclaimed Tim, as he ushered me around the car to show me his spare engine in the boot.

Bloke comes prepared.

Tim calls it his ‘Wolfsburg Windsor.’

Tim (and lovely Frau Nettie) acknowledged that they’ve taken some FlaK (an acronym taken from the German “Flugzeug ab Kanone”… anti-aircraft cannon… for you Jeopardy wannabees) regarding his variant rendering of the Cobra/LeMans racing stripes… which Tim derisively calls ‘Terlingua graffiti.’ He vows to abandon the K-mart ‘Budget Shopper’ spray cans in the future, although he won’t yield in his determination to run the stripe over the engine. And over the taillights. Sigh.

Tim insists he was Baron Manfred von Richthofen’s wingman in the famed Fliegender Zirkus (Flying Circus) during The Great War. Rumour has it he got shot down by Snoopie.

There was one persistent annoyance that we encountered. You see, um, shuffle shuffle… sheesh… each time you open a door or deck, um, it falls off. Those duct-tape hinges just don’t measure up to the task at hand.

Tim scoffs at said observation, reassuring us with “Hell, this demonstrates my passion for authenticity. That particular feature was standard on Carroll’s original Cobras!”

This was all in fun, folks.

Oh! Don’t ask Tim about the bantam rooster he was carrying around under his arm
at the show. You don’t wanna know.

   Now, in tribute…

above: We sure miss ya’, good buddy. Tim passed away unexpectedly
on Thursday, September 30, 2004.

Tim A. Figuhr, June 28, 1937–Sept. 30, 2004.

back to the Humor Department

—Copyright Notice—

*****

Sidewinder Tip#1: you can instantly find/return to this Great driveTrain Robbery coverage by just using Sidewinder. For example, just type <Tim Figuhr> or <train robbery> or even <bantam rooster> into the ‘Sidewinder’ search box.

Tip#2: If you type the words <photo feature> or <event coverage>  into Sidewinder, you’ll get a scrolling roster of hotlinks to every one of CobraCountry’s photo-feature articles.

Back to the Humor Department articles